Sometimes the Darkest Days Teach us the Most

Jun 2

I’m not good with numbers. Once, while at the Hedo Ol’ timer’s welcome cocktail party, I was asked how many times we have been to Hedo and I had no idea. Almost everyone in the room knew their number by heart and proudly shouted it out when asked. All I could say was “A lot”. Someone with the resort replied back that I had been there 44 times. (apparently, they keep track). I have been back many times since, but I couldn’t tell you “my number” still.

I’ve been through a lot of hurricanes. How many? I have no idea. But it’s over 35. There have been 39 named tropical storms and hurricanes to hit New Orleans since 2000 (and I arrived in 1996). I lost count of how many I flew in, rode out, and evacuated from a long time ago, but I do know this, I hate them.

I really hate hurricanes.

The first hurricane I ever experienced was in North Carolina. I was in the USCG, going through rescue swimmer school and I heard stories from many “salty” rescue guys who made me nervous from their stories.

It turned out that that first one wasn’t that bad, and I figured they were exaggerating. They weren’t, I just hadn’t been through a big one. Yet.

I got my first hurricane search and rescue (SAR) case during Hugo, back in 1989. It was the first time I thought I might die in my life. The helicopter twisted and turned in the wind like I never knew it could. That day, I decided I didn’t like hurricanes.

A few years later, I was in hurricane-force winds, during a blizzard in NYC. I remember talking to Tess on the phone and she asked me if we would fly in that weather. Probably not, I answered just as the SAR alarm went off and I only had time to say “gotta go” and hung up. It was at least 4 hours before I could call her back. It was the second time in my life that I thought I would die.

But I didn’t.

We rescued 42 people, two dogs, and a cat that day. Over the years I learned not to like those winds. Those damn winds. They just kept blowing and blowing. Relentlessly.

My next station was New Orleans and you all know what that means. Lots and lots of hurricanes. And while I have a lot of experience with them, and you already know that I hate them, so I want to share what I have learned from them:

1. Until people experience one, they will not understand. I didn’t until I did. So many people here discounted Agatha, they never will again.

2. Even people who have been through hurricanes will forget or minimize their experience until it happens again. With so many near misses in New Orleans, people stopped evacuating. This is a cycle that will repeat itself over time. You can count on that.

3. Unlike earthquakes, flash floods, and tornadoes, hurricanes last a long time. It is both physically and mentally challenging. At first, you think “We got this” after an hour, you start to wonder if you can hold up. After two and a half hours, you wonder if it is ever going to stop. After 4 hours, you are ready to give in and give up.

4. The first phase, post-hurricane, is one of amazement and disbelief. People wander the streets, beaches, and neighborhoods looking like zombies. They look shocked, they actually are in shock.

5. Gratitude is real. You are grateful to be alive, you are grateful to see neighbors and family, and you are grateful for anything left standing. You are grateful for anything and everything. Most of all, you are grateful that the damn hurricane is finally over.

6. The next phase is when the government comes in and assesses the damage. This is a very important step that will help decide where to send relief, the military, power companies, food, clothing, and supplies.

7. People will question the government’s response. They cannot see the entire plan, but they will always think there is not enough being done, and things are not moving fast enough. Time passes slowly after a hurricane. Minutes seem like hours. Hours seem like forever.

8. Clean-up is hard. People will work day and night. They will lift, shovel, carry and do more than they thought they could ever do, and then they will do some more. They will be sore, but they will get the job done. And they will know who they will go into battle with in the future (and who they won’t).

You have to give yourself breaks (both physical and mental). Everything doesn’t have to be cleaned up on day 1. Do your best, but give yourself time to recharge and you will be more effective.

9. Things will get better faster than anyone expected. People will come together to clear roads, feed people, clean up, and remove water and debris. Government agencies turn out to be more efficient than most people give credit and they will move mountains in short order.

10. PTSD is real. You will never forget being in a hurricane, even if that memory fades over time. Many people will have long-lasting effects. My sister moved out of Florida after 3 hurricanes crisscrossed her neighborhood in one season.

She now has a hurricane bunker. She hates hurricanes too.

11. Some people are jerks. They will ask for handouts, but they won’t help anyone else. People will scam people in dire need and take their money and run. Be careful to who you give money in times of a disaster, not everyone is trying to help.

12. People are awesome. The biggest thing I have learned from all of these storms and all of these lessons is that while there are jerks and scammers out there, there are more kind people than not. There are more neighbors than they knew they had. There are strangers that will help out without even knowing anyone from the impacted area.

I had a neighbor, who wouldn’t give me the time of day to ask me if I needed anything right before Agatha got here. Afterward, he asked how I was doing and asked about my house. Hurricanes change people and mainly for the good. It shows them what really matters.

It’s the one thing that gives me hope. It’s the one thing that moves me forward when the storm gets close. It helps me through that third hour when my arms are tired from pushing against a sliding glass door that is about to blow in and cover us all in broken glass. Our one last layer of protection from the storm.

“We got this.”

“We will not fail today.”

I remember saying this to my friends as we pushed on those glass doors, but I was saying it to myself as much as I was to everyone else. Sometimes we all need a pep talk, no matter how much experience we have.

Once again, I feared death but lived to tell about it.

Because I would not fail on that day. And I (once again) know who I will go to war with.

But I think this will be my last hurricane. I’m done. No mas. From now on, I will head out and watch from afar and then go back in to help clean up. There just isn’t anything worth dying for. No house, car, material things.

It’s best to board up, batten down the hatches and get the hell out of mother nature’s way. Trust me, I have been through more hurricanes than I can count. And I know, it’s not worth what it can do to your soul.

And while our wings are broken, down here in Zipolite, Mexico, I know we will not fail.

We will fly again.

You can count on that.

On May 30th, a Cat 2 (almost a Cat 3) hurricane hit Zipolite, Mexico. This is the free-est place I have ever lived. You can walk naked on the beach (Mexico’s ONLY recognized “Nude Beach”), you can meditate, dance, be gay, straight, or somewhere in between, and for the most part, no one cares.

It devestated the Oaxacan coast. Buildings here are not meant to withstand a hurricane. The pain they are going through is real. Below is a GoFundMe campaign to help the poorest people on the coast. And below that are some photos so you can see what we just went through.

https://www.gofundme.com/f/the-oaxacan-coast-needs-your-help?utm_campaign=p_cf+share-flow-1&utm_medium=social&utm_source=instagram