The New Reality: Drugs and Safety at Swinger Events

I remember the good ol’ days when the only thing I had to worry about was if enough people were showing up to a party so that I could pay the DJ. Things were much simpler back then and as our parties and events grew, so did our responsibility.

Times have changed

Now we have to worry about security, cameras, consent, drug use and whether or not someone is going to slip on a wet floor. The amount of liability insurance we have to buy now is a far cry from the days when we were more worried about our friends parking their cars on our neighbor’s grass when they came to our house parties.

A few years ago, a couple drowned in a hot tub at a party in Tennessee. No one found them until the next morning. Apparently drinking, sex and heart issues are not a good mix for hot tubs.

A man died of drowning in a pool at a swinger’s party in the UK. He was drinking a lot.

Just this week, two people died from an apparent overdose while at a hotel takeover in Minnesota. They found fentanyl in the drugs.

The hardest part of running events nowadays always involves drugs (note: alcohol is a drug). Pretty much all clubs and events have strict “No Drugs” rules, but attendees often buy alcoholic drinks or BYOB their alcohol to parties and this is what causes most of our issues. In many states marijuana is legal and while some will allow the use, most do not allow THC on their property, but it is impossible to know if someone ate an edible, and vapes with THC are everywhere.

“Party drugs” like MDMA (otherwise known as Molly or Ecstasy), Cocaine, GHB & Ketamine have started to become more popular in swing clubs these days. They were always popular with teens and young adults at raves, bars, nightclubs, concerts, and parties to heighten sensory perceptions and reduce inhibitions and now those young adults have grown up and are going to lifestyle events.

Adapting to a new reality

Event planners can pretend that this does not exist and simply hope that none of the examples above will happen at their club or party, but the reality is that something could happen at any time and whether or not the club or event promoter is ready for it will determine whether or not this is a close call or a tragedy.

Festivals are already ahead of the curve because they have existed in this reality for some time. Being part of Burning Man events has taught us that it is important to have protocols for emergencies, such as how to deal with intoxicated attendees, aggressive behavior, consent issues and even overdoses.

Most festivals and events are required to have local law enforcement, EMTs and sometimes fire departments onsite. Rarely have I seen any of these at lifestyle events. But that is about to change.

We welcome questions about our protocols and safety measures. We believe more people should ask questions and demand improvements in this industry which will improve the overall quality of events and prevent serious problems.

What to expect at Naughty Events

Our main goal is to prevent problems, but we have to be able to assess and deal with issues if and when they come up.

We have been using local police and Sheriff officers for over 20 years. Having a visible presence of law enforcement is a great way to deter and prevent problems and it gives you a much faster response time when issues arise.

We recently decided to add EMTs to our events from 8 pm till 4 am (the peak hours of our events) to ensure that any medical emergencies have a faster response time than if they had to come from a 911 call.

We have counselors on call in case there are any consent issues or heated arguments that could use someone to de-escalate and potentially mediate. We use people outside of the owners of the company to make decisions so that safety is always the first priority and not financial decisions.

We make sure our facilities have AEDs, NARCAN and basic first-aid supplies on hand around the clock. While our team of volunteers (over 120 people in New Orleans) is way to big to have all of them certified in First Aid, we have a communication system in place so that any emergency can be quickly communicated to the correct person (law enforcement, EMTs or counselors) so that we can react quickly in order to save precious time.

We have a chain of command in place so that things are passed down and we know (internally) what is going on during other people’s shifts to help us identify problems that might be happening even when our team members are not on duty. We document everything to ensure we can help people, once they head home in case an issue is not resolved at the event.

We also work with other clubs and organizers to share information to make sure serial predators and people with known issues are not permitted access.

Last year we decided to offer free test strips for fentanyl with a no-questions-asked policy for those who picked them up. We will have them in a discreet location, but clearly marked, so people can take them to make sure that whatever they have is not laced with fentanyl.

We provide lubricant and condoms in the playroom to ensure that everyone can practice safe sex, without using excuses like “I forgot them” or “they are too expensive”.

Education is important

This year, we are having a discussion about harm reduction for club owners and event producers, so we can hear what other people are doing and what has worked and what hasn’t in our industry.

We are also having some classes where we talk about drug use in this lifestyle like adults, instead of pretending that it isn’t happening.

We have classes about consent to educate people in order to prevent consent issues. We also reinforce that with a lot of signage that includes how to contact us and other organizations if they do not feel safe.

We remind everyone to keep an eye out for their significant others, their friends and other attendees and to alert us if they see someone who looks too intoxicated to consent, or looks like they are having issues walking or needs help getting back to their room.

At the end of the day, there is no way to have a perfectly safe event. Things are going to happen that are beyond our ability to prevent, but we should do our best to be prepared as much as we can. We cannot bury our heads in the sand. We have to treat our attendees like the adults that they are, while having firm policies and guidelines, coupled with compassion and empathy.

Fentanyl is here and we have to deal with it

Here are the facts: Fentanyl is a powerful opioid, like heroin or morphine. It's used to treat severe pain, like after surgery. But fentanyl can be 50 times stronger than heroin and 100 times stronger than morphine. As a result, just a few grains of fentanyl can cause a fatal overdose.

In 2023, DEA seized more than 80 million fentanyl-laced fake pills and nearly 12,000 pounds of fentanyl powder. The 2023 seizures are equivalent to more than 390 million lethal doses of fentanyl.

While Fentanyl Test Strips are an important harm-reduction tool, they may not work in all cases. You can get more information about Fentanyl and harm reduction from this website, which has been put together by the CDC.

It’s time the industry worked together

Historically, clubs and event promoters have celebrated when another club failed, thinking that there would be more clients for themselves. This is very short sided and the truth is that more clubs and events mean more people will find out about and get involved in this lifestyle, and they will start looking for other clubs and events to try out.

The more our industry grows and evolves the better it is for all of us.

It is so easy to sit back and blame others. It is so easy to go on social media and try to hurt other promoters when something goes wrong. But eventually, something will go wrong at your club or your party. As you grow, so does your liability and your chance of serious incidents.

And when that happens, another up-and-coming promoter or club owner will point their fingers at you and say “This is why I am not supporting this club/event.” It’s easy to be part of the problem, its hard being part of the solution.

If you are a club or an event promoter, I urge you to reach out to the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom (NCSF) for advice on harm prevention. Or reach out to our owners at info@Naughty-Events.com and lets keep the dialog going. Let’s work collectively to share ideas and improve the safety and security at events across the US and far beyond.