Top 10 things (Part 3) that have changed in swinging in the past 25 years
Part 3: Diversity
This is part 3 of our series of Top 10 things that have changed in swinging in the past 25 years. This week’s top 10 list takes us to number five: Diversity. This subject has many different subcategories, so we made it the entire subject of this week’s Top 10 list.
If you missed Part 1, you can click here to go back so you can start from the beginning.
If you missed Part 2, you can click here to go back so you can read all of the series.
From our Sexual Freedom Parade
5. Diversity
One of the biggest changes between then and now is diversity. There are three main types of diversity we will discuss, but each one is very important which is why we want to single out each one. When we started our events, the majority of people were heterosexual, middle ages couples with an upper-middle-class stature. We are glad to see a much more diverse crowd not only at our events but at clubs all over the country.
We can’t take credit for this change, even though we have worked hard to make our event more inclusive and diverse, the country has also become more diverse and that is great news for the future of our industry.
Age Diversity
The average age at our events when we started was 40-60 years old with 50 being the average. When we were chartering cruise ships, we got the age data from the cruises (you had to list your age) and we saw the average age drop down to 45. That wasn’t a huge shift, but what we saw was that we now had couples in their 20s and 30s attending so the overall age became more diverse and younger.
Adding EDM music to the mix also helped. Probably the biggest boost for younger couples was having an Ambassador Program, where those who could not afford to attend conventions and cruises could attend for free by volunteering to help set up, tear down, and provide one shift per day in return for a free pass.
Economic Diversity
We also saw a shift in age because of economics. We spent a lot of time trying to figure out how to get younger attendees and we saw a direct correlation between price and age. Cruises were all-inclusive and overall cheaper than big conventions (when you factored in food and drinks), so they brought a younger crowd.
We came up with ways for people of all ages to attend for free or at a discounted price, because we did not want only upper-middle-class white people attending our events. We have been striving for economic diversity since we started.
We never wanted the price to be the only deciding factor on whether or not to attend one of our events.
Note: If you want to attend one of our events and cannot afford the convention pass, email us at info@Naughty-Events.com and we’ll see if one of our programs is suited for you so that you can attend.
Racial Diversity
Years ago, we had some people question whether or not they would “fit in” because all of the photos on our website represented the white, older crowd mentioned previously. Event producers and club owners cannot “make” their attendees a certain color or age, but they can appeal to a diverse crowd by making sure the images reflect diversity.
Harder yet was finding POC that would agree to be seen on social media and on our websites. We got more replies of “no thank you” from minority couples that wanted to remain anonymous, but that makes it even harder to recruit a more diverse crowd. People need to see people like themselves (age, weight, race, etc…) in advertisements and on our website in order to appeal to them.
Music was another thing we had to look at not only appeal to younger attendees but to a more diverse ethnic group and BIPOC (Black, Indigenous People of Color) which includes African American or Black; Hispanic, Latino or Chicano; Asian or Pacific Islander; American Indian or Native American or Alaskan Native.
At Naughty Events, we made a conscious effort to contact diverse groups, clubs, and organizers to see what we could do to appeal to different communities, cultures, and preferences.
Race in the lifestyle panel
We added speakers of different ethnicities. We had panels that broached rarely talked about subjects like “Race in the Lifestyle”. When working with producers of TV and news documentaries, we always tried to put them in touch with very diverse clients to help show that this lifestyle appeals to all people, not just upper-middle-class 50-year-old white couples.
That didn’t come without challenges.
This article isn’t meant to be a pat on the back blog, it is meant to show the real gains AND losses we have seen throughout the years. The past 25 years is littered with failures as well as successes.
We had an event producer that had parties called “the Chocolate Parties” which was geared towards interracial swingers, mainly white couples looking for single black males to party with.
While we never made the “Chocolate Parties” an official part of our events, they rented suites at our events and there was always a “Chocolate Room” where people could go to meet up with single black men and that was looked down on by some in our collective community.
After talking to some wonderful black leaders in the lifestyle community, we decided to change this and not allow these sub-parties at our events. Instead, we came up with a different solution for people that wanted to play with singles, we opened up the Plus 1 Club, a place where couples can meet singles at lifestyle events, but we would not allow them to be a place for only black single men.
We opened up this room to single white, Hispanic, Asian, and other ethnicities and even single ladies. We are still working hard to make this room even more diverse and inclusive because we want to promote diverse sexuality rather than racial stereotypes.
Note: If you know some amazing singles that would like to attend our events, please send them to our Naughty Events website and let them know we do allow a small percentage of exceptional singles (both men and women).
Sexual Diversity
When we started back in 1999, pretty much every man at the event identified themselves as straight and many of the women were either bisexual or strongly encouraged to be bisexual. It was a very male-dominated world where testosterone flowed and men wanted to see women together but would not tolerate seeing men together, especially in playrooms.
We are glad to say that this has changed a lot over the years and we have been pushing the needle for most of the past 20 years for change. We were the first big lifestyle event to have bisexual meet & greets where males were encouraged to be out and open.
In the beginning, we had these meet & greets outside of the hotel, because many of the men didn’t want other men seeing them at a bisexual event. If you were there for the same reason, then fine, but they didn’t want anyone else judging them for being bisexual. Many just wanted to talk to someone who was bisexual to see if this was for them, and they were afraid to broach the subject with just anyone at the event.
Eventually, we decided that the Meet & Greets needed to be inside the hotel, out in the open if we were ever going to break through the negative stigmas surrounding male bisexuality. We had panel discussions about male bisexuality and we told women that they don’t need to be bisexual, that bisexuality is nothing anyone can make you or judge you for, it is simply who you are and we should all be accepted for who we are. Especially at a lifestyle convention.
We included articles about male bisexuality in our programs and we finally introduced the first openly bisexual playroom, which not only allowed but encouraged male bisexuality at a large event.
There were clear signs put outside the room that told people to respect everyone in this room and that if this is not their thing, they should try another room. After many years and a lot of effort, our events are more sexually diverse than ever and we are very proud of this fact.
To see more of our top 10 list, stay tuned… Next up is “Tantra & Teamwork”.