TIPS FOR NAUGHTY NEWBIES
2019 was my first Naughty N'awlins—and it was only about a year into my journey in the lifestyle. I remember how nervous I was going into it, not only as a newbie to Naughty N'awlins but also as a unicorn. I was worried about being asked to do stuff, coming off as awkward, not dressing the part and basically anything else you can be insecure about.
But to my pleasant surprise, it was not the intimidating experience I thought it was going to be. Most of the new people I met were very helpful when it came to the questions and curiosities I had. I learned a lot from my first Naughty experience and walked away with a new sense of adventure and self-confidence. And I wanted to be that friendly, helpful person to anyone out there reading this who is planning on going to Naughty N'awlins this year, or anyone new to the lifestyle and just needs a little help boosting their confidence in the scene.
Ask Questions
No question is a dumb question. In fact, asking questions like consent, or boundaries, rules and instructional will get you far in the lifestyle. Asking for consent is our #1 rule at Naughty N'awlins—it's a non-negotiable must. Aside from that, don't be afraid to ask the new people you meet about their preferences, their relationship rules if they have them, ask our educators questions to learn more about the topic at hand and ask questions while playing in the playrooms to get a better feel for how to pleasure your partner(s) and yourself.
Body Positivity
You are going to see people naked. Read that again. And no, that does not mean YOU have to be naked. But if the vibe is right and you're surrounded by other people who may have taken their tops off, or decided to completely nude, feel free to do so as well! I mean, how many events/conventions can you think of where this is allowed other than in the lifestyle? None. No one expects you to look like a Sports Illustrated model and you'd be amazed at the body positive feedback you will receive just for being bold enough to bare it all. Love your body because it is beautiful and feel free to flaunt it no matter what.
It's absolutely ok to say NO
It's also likely that someone is going to flirt with you. And when that happens, that can lead to more, like wanting to go to the playrooms, wanting to share partners, try something new and sexual or anything else that might come up. If you don't want to do it, and if it just doesn't feel right—please say NO. Just because you are at a sex-positive event does not mean you are obligated to do anything you aren't comfortable doing. When I was approached at my first experience, I knew what I was willing to do and also knew what I didn't want to do. I relayed those things to the new people I met and they respected those boundaries. If you have any trouble at all in terms of this, please see at Naughty Staff member and they will help you through this.
Everyone else is probably a little nervous too
We've been pent up for months, very little contact and just the overall stress of the year. Yeah, I'd say emotions might be a little high. We suspect a good mix of both loyal returning fans and also new-comers this year at Naughty N'awlins. Trust me when I say, the people you meet are probably just as nervous, excited and amped up as you. So allow awkward conversations to happen and just laugh them off, and be real about how you're feeling because the seasoned vets will totally understand because they were once in your shoes and the other newbies will be in the same boat as you.
You do not have to prove yourself
There are going to be people at Naughty N'awlins who do it all: they are sexy, well versed and well-known in the lifestyle, they have amazing costumes, know how to use all the toys, are stars in the playrooms, know all the fun tricks and just exude sexual freedom. It's perfectly ok if that person is not you. If this is your first Naughty N'awlins and you're coming into it a little "vanilla," or inexperienced, use this as an educational experience to watch, learn and observe. Don't feel like a total failure if you aren't the most popular person there, if you don't know certain terminology, if people aren't falling at your feet to sleep with you and so on. You have nothing to prove. You came to Naughty N'awlins 2020, the biggest lifestyle convention in the world (and this year in the middle of an international crisis), and lived to tell the tale. If that's not badass, I don't know what is.
Wear something that makes you feel great
This is a great time to bust out those costumes, lingerie and sexy pieces that have been collecting dust all year (damn you COVID). Have fun with your outfits! Pack a cohesive mix of both clothes to walk around the city in and then change into something extra special at night. We make it super easy by having theme nights every evening. Use those as your guide for what to dress up in and then let your creative juices flow. You're in New Orleans, you can NEVER be too over the top, so by all means, go for it. The more confident you feel in your attire and in yourself, the more it will show to others and the more connections you will make.
Communicate with your partner(s)
If you're coming with a partner or partners, be sure you have "The Talk." Rules, boundaries, big no-nos, things you'd like to experience, what you'd like to learn for going to Naughty N'awlins and anything else that might need to be discussed. The last thing you want to happen is a huge relationship meltdown in the middle of the biggest party of 2020. Discuss everything concerning your relationship prior to the event so you know exactly what the boundaries (if any) are, and then continue to check in with each other throughout the duration of the event. Going to Naughty N'awlins can really be an amazing experience that can strengthen your relationship if you let it. Just be 100% honest and transparent with each other.
Take it easy
If you're coming for the full duration of Naughty N'awlins, you're going to be with us for 5 days (Nov 11 -15). Pace out your drinking, Naughty times, spending and anything else indulgent. Don't go blow it all on the first day and then feel miserable the remainder of the time. We have so much planned for you and we want you to be part of every bit of it. The festivities only get better as the weekend progresses. Take your time and savor every second of it: every connection you make, exploring the gorgeous city of New Orleans, the great parties we'll have and the memories you're going to make.
Try or learn something new
Naughty N'awlins has one of the biggest and best sex positive educational programs in the world. Although this year's roster of educators will be slightly lighter than usual (more on that to come), we still plan on providing you with industry-leading lifestyle/sex positive experts to teach you the ropes and introduce you to new things. Take some time to join a workshop, class or panel discussion to expand your knowledge and vernacular of the sex positive world. You'll go home with new mindsets and new tricks up your sleeve.
And most importantly: have fun and be safe!
